This just isn't for me

Between you and i
there is a familiarity -
the comfort from the years we've been friends,
the sacred "don't tell anyone else but"s and "you'll be okay without her"s.

Between you and i
there was a thin piece of sheet,
the barrier that differentiated almost and too late.
It was what we were so glad was there but simultaneously wished wasn't.

Between you and i
was an infinity that would never get smaller,
it held the things that were important to you -
the things that will always be irrelevant to me.
It was my ambition and your lack of confidence,
it was your insecurities and my apathy.
It was effort that wouldn't reap outcome,
the epitome of things that aren't meant to be.

Between you and i
were "i miss you"s that you wanted to hear
and "i love you"s that i didn't mean.
I wished you didn't call me dear,
and that you'd rethink all the parts of me you think you've seen.

I'm so sorry,
I'm so sorry.