countdown

ten, nine, eight

it's all too late

seven, six, five
i could have loved you all my life

four, three, two
there's nothing more that I will do

we're down to one

and i've finally decided that i'm done

I am the people I meet

l'm the guy I met a few times at the bar

because I eat the sweet he eats 

when he's smoking when I'm smoking

I am my sister

because the song she listens to

when she's feeling fucked up

is the song I listen to when I'm high

I am my mother

because the first cigarette I've tasted

is the cigarette she dutifully smokes

I am the guy I could have loved

because he's perfect

but I'm not & thats okay

I am my used to be best friend

I'm so happy she's at a good place

a place I'll never be 

a place I thank god I'll never be 

I am the person I once loved

because I still look for him

in everyone I try to not love

I am my friend

because I compare myself to her 

with every bite i take 

I am the person I should have loved

because I think about him

when I shouldn't 

but it's too late

but mostly, I think I'm my own person

because I'm made out of the people I've met

no one will meet the same bunch of people

I am feeling alive but I'm undoubtly dead inside